Knowledge of Self; Knowledge of Teaching

When it comes to building on self-knowledge, I view it as an ongoing cycle. This is partly because we start the world in a state that it not self aware, and then build out of it as we exit childhood. However, the behaviors, emotions, and habits of childhood are ingrained in us. Adding to this is the ever-increasing change of our person over time. This change occurs day by day; rarely is there a "come to Damscus" moment in our lives. This makes change creep up on us. Change in motivation, change in habit, and change in desires can build slowly and subtly.

Self-discovery is understanding just what we want, why we want it, and what has changed about ourselves. Additionally, at a certain point self-discovery crosses with self-creation, where desire comes into contact with will and we overtly change behavior - self knowledge leads to change, which in turn leads to more self-discovery. This is why those who are much older, though they may be able to understand the younger, are not operating in similar modes.

I try to make adding to self-knowledge a conscious process. I am always polling myself for the desires of end-goals. How much do I want my house in order? vs. How much do I want to finish my next book on time? How much do I want to play video games? vs. How much do I want to read? How good am I at each of these things? Do they net me products I want? Eventually, through such polling (as well as experience) I learn not only my true preferences, but how well I perform at a given task.

Application to Teaching and Music

My own preferences have changed in the last ten years; likewise my skills have also changed. I would prefer to teach at the secondary level, but my skills are primarily concentrated in those that I used teaching at the college level, specifically guitar. If I want to meet my preference for teaching band and orchestra, I will need to develop knowledge of the curriculum.

I know, because of my lack of experience, my primary shortfall is in knowledge of educational literature for music. Most of my current knowledge is focused around guitar literature, and of that most of it is advanced because of the students I have served over the last ten years. This is teaching knowledge that I need to acquire, but I will also need to acquire some self-knowledge, particularly as I enter the secondary market. I need to know what music I prefer to instruct as well as what is best for the students. I need to come to know student preferences as well as what they excel at.  I need to know how I best learn this knowledge as well. I have many resources at my disposal for this purpose, but I know that learning the literature will be a learning about learning experience for me as well.